A Simple Life

15.04.05.01

A Simple Life, Version 3.1 of the "Culture & Change" Speech Contest Speech

One summer, long ago, a banker was vacationing in a small village on the coast. He saw a fisherman in a small boat by the pier with a handful of fish that he had just caught. The businessman asked him how long it took to catch the fish, and the man said he was out in the water for only a couple of hours.

"So why didn't you stay out there longer to catch more fish?" asked the banker. The fisherman said he catches just enough to feed his family every day and then comes back.

"But it's only 2:00 p.m.," said the banker. "What do you do with the rest of your time?"

The fisherman smiled and said, "Well, I sleep late every day, then fish a little, go home, play with my children, take a nap in the afternoon, then stroll into the village each evening with my wife, play the guitar with our friends, and laugh and sing late into the night. I have a full and wonderful life!"

The banker scoffed at the young man. "Well, I'm a businessman from New York! Let me tell you what you should do instead of wasting your life like this! You should catch more fish to sell to others, and then buy a bigger boat with the money you make so you can catch even more fish."

"And then what?" asked the fisherman. The banker's eyes got all big as he enthusiastically explained, "You can then buy a whole fleet of fishing boats, run a business, and make a ton of money!"

"And then what?" asked the fisherman again. The banker threw his hands in the air and said, "You'd be worth a million! Then you can leave this small town, move to the city, and manage your enterprise from there."

"How long would this take?" asked the fisherman. "Fifteen to twenty years," replied the banker.

"And then what?"

The banker laughed and said, "That's the best part. You can then sell your business, move to a small village, sleep late, fish a little, play with your grandchildren, take naps in the afternoon, go for an evening stroll with your wife after dinner, relax, sing and play the guitar with your friends. You could have a full and wonderful life!"

The fisherman smiled at the banker, quietly gathered his catch, and walked away.

The Moral of the Story

Mr. President, fellow Toastmasters, and guests, thank you very much for the opportunity to share "The Moral of the Story" with you: learning to appreciate our lives just as they are.

Like the banker in the story, it seems like most of us are urgently rushing toward some goal or dream or an ever-elusive "finish line." For those of us in here, the finish line is obvious: our release date, if we have one. Under the pretense of pursuing happiness, we imagine a different version of ourselves in the distant future, often richer, calmer, more stable, and wiser.

Instead of being grateful for what we already have, we exhaust ourselves with cravings and longings for something we haven't or haven't yet achieved. Rather than seeing how wonderful our existing friendships and relationships are, we tend to regard them as inferior to the imaginary versions we've created in our minds.

I truly feel sorry for those of my fellow inmates who trudge through their sentences with the attitude that this time must be simply endured and quickly forgotten when they leave.

I don’t believe a single one of us chose to come to prison, but once we’re here, we’ve invested quite a lot to be here. This experience has cost me and my family everything, which is one of the main reasons it makes me so sad when I see so many others unwisely wasting this valuable opportunity they have already paid so dearly for. The theme of this contest is “A Culture of Change.” I think that means, how can we affect a positive change in our culture? I learned in the midst of trying to save my failing marriage that it is not reasonable to expect that I could change my partner to save the relationship, only myself. Accordingly, if you want to change the culture, you have to start with yourself.

I believe a potent catalyst to promote this change is “Gratitude.” Pause for a moment and honor the progress you’ve already made and acknowledge the gifts you already have. Stop for a minute on a regular basis and reflect on how good life really is. Being continually grateful will help you re-frame how you view and experience life.

I am grateful for so much in my life! I don’t have nearly enough time to list everything I’m grateful for, so to name a very few: I am grateful that I have made more friends and more meaningful relationships in my six years of incarceration than possibly my entire adult life combined. I am grateful I have free access to one of the best healthcare systems in the world; I am grateful I have hot and cold running water when over two billion people don’t; I am grateful I can eat three hot, balanced, and nutritious meals every day, which often include fresh fruit, vegetables, and animal protein. I am grateful that I have access to a whole library full of books and the time to read them; I am grateful that I can be a member of this Good Club where I have overcome my fear of speaking in public, and finally, I am grateful that I have had the opportunity to realize I don’t need anything to be happy.

So, instead of spending so much time thinking about what’s missing from your life, remind yourself of what you already have. Celebrate the fact that you are so far beyond simply surviving and are actually quite spoiled compared to so many others. When you approach each moment with gratitude, not only will you stop feeling like you’re missing out, but you will also experience abundance.