12/2/2023 - Good bye to my best Friend David Neil Laime December 19, 1971 ~ December 24, 2022Articles

Good bye to my best Friend David Neil Laime December 19, 1971 ~ December 24, 2022

12/2/2023 Top News World News Opinion

Dave was a shining beacon of light for me and everyone fortunate enough to cross his path. Our lives intersected at RMA when he transferred there at the beginning of his junior year. It wasn't long before we became fast friends, not only within the halls of RMA but also in a friendship that would endure a lifetime. For reasons I can't quite fathom, I only learned of his passing at 8:00 PM today (December 2, 2023). He's been gone almost a year, and I only just found out. Now, here I am, reaching for a tissue that I suspect I'll be needing for a while. And since I've got no better outlet, I feel compelled to share my experiences with Dave, the rudder of my life.

I don't recall much of my interactions with Dave during our junior year, except that by its end, Dave had become one of my closest friends—and it wasn't just Dave, but also Barbara, Floyd, and eventually Adrienne who became part of my extended family.

The following summer remains one of my most cherished memories. I was heading to Rehoboth Beach for a job when Dave, true to his generous nature, handed me the keys to his Motomarina Raven 49 cc moped because he didn't need it anymore. About a month into my beach gig, I rang up Dave's house and got Barbara on the line. I told her about the character-building experience I was enjoying—spending days fabricating fence on the beach and nights playing roller hockey. Coincidentally, Dave had just totaled her car, and she figured a dose of character-building at the beach would do him good too. My boarding mother had a spare room, which was perfect timing.

With hopes of steering her son straight, Barbara sent Dave to the beach that weekend. Dave didn't miss a beat on his first night. "Let's get some beer," he declared. Luckily, our over-21 roommates were more than willing to help us stockpile a treasure trove of cheap beer and wine coolers. Armed with a duffle bag, we made our way to the beach and swiftly became the heart of the beach's social whirlwind, a ritual we branded "Hollering." Many nights followed, spent lounging at a deserted beach house tucked between Rehoboth and Dewey Beach. That empty haven became our go-to for nights filled with drinks and camaraderie on the back porch.

For two brief weeks in our senior year, we shared a room at RMA in the coveted former staff apartment on Band Squadron in the main building—a stint that, unfortunately, didn't end well for either of us. This was a very nice room with an "elbow" in it and roughly twice the square footage of the typical cadet room, and I had managed to install a mid-sized couch for optimal hanging out. When I was punished for being involved in a serious car accident and stripped of my rank, it more importantly cost me my room and my roommate Dave. For Dave, he lost the room as well since whoever got it would choose their roommate, and it wasn't going to be him.

Dave was a spirited and outspoken jokester. Once, in jest, he made what many would consider a lighthearted comment about the nature of a ranking cadet's girlfriend, to which they responded by breaking Dave's jaw. This necessitated an extended convalescent leave from school and ultimately resulted in his departure from RMA in the midst of our senior year. And this certainly shaped Dave's life as well.

Life of the Party

The following fall, while at Frostburg State University, I got a midweek call from Dave on Halloween weekend. He was ready for a road trip, and so was I—no calendar needed. He rolled up in his mom's trusty '80s Honda Civic, and with barely $40 to our names, we set off for Columbus where an acquaintance of his, who was also a beach girlfriend, was studying at Ohio State. We chain-smoked generic cigarettes and belted out "Ball and Chain" and "Story of My Life" by Social Distortion the entire drive. Picking up his girlfriend, we headed to Athens to dive into the infamous OU Halloween festivities, meeting her friend and soaking in the celebrations. I fondly recall him spending the last of our cigarette money on roses for his girlfriend. Other weekends found us at Radford, Virginia Tech, and ODU in Richmond, making the most of our youthful freedom.

That 90's Show

Those basement hangouts at Barbara's, so reminiscent of That '70s Show, with Dave hammering out tunes on the keyboard, are etched in my mind. He wrote a song named "Hold On Monique," dedicated to Monique from RMA. Every time he dated a new girl, he'd change the name of the song accordingly :). That futon in the basement heard plenty of our wild plans and saw a revolving door of Dave's admirers. The Naked Soul Brothers' band gigs, the house parties, and the girls—they all painted the backdrop of our escapades. Being the wingman to a guy like Dave meant I was never short on company, and I wouldn't trade those times for the world.

Dave's favorite outfit...

Here, we see another shot of Dave with Carrie. The thing is, just before I took this picture, Dave had just taken a shower. Exiting the bathroom visible in basement group shot above, he proceeded to individually molest - no better word for it - each and every girl hanging out in his basement that evening. It was a remarkable show of charisma. I have known few people who could just take it for granted they could nude wrestle a room full of girls and get away with it!

Dave Visit to Palm Harbor 1995

On a normal, if boring, afternoon shortly after arriving in Florida, I got a call from Dave asking if I'd like to drive up to Ocala to pick him up. There was no GPS then—just the Rand McNally Road Atlas—and using that as my guide, I hit the road and drove what seemed like forever to a spot next to the woods in Ocala, where Dave had been camping for some time. There, he proudly showed me his vast personal possessions: a Navy Seabag, a pair of socks, a spoon, and a tarp. If you aren't getting it, he had nothing and was completely and utterly content with that. He explained to me that after he finished touring with the Dead or Phish, he decided to hang out in Ocala for a while, where he had met a local girl. I didn't get much more about this, but I'm betting he disappeared without a word.

Dave playing the original World of Warcraft 1995

We drove back to Palm Harbor, and just like our summer in Rehoboth Beach, the first thing he wanted to do upon arrival was have me take him to the beach. So I dropped him off at the beach, and he spent his days traipsing around Pier 60. Inevitably, as only Dave could, he quickly developed a bustling social life, and I acquired a passing, temporary girlfriend—the best friend of the girl he met on the beach—and together we enjoyed many fun-filled afternoons of eating and other enjoyable activities.

One Not Taken

I was lucky enough to be friends with Dave during his time with the Naked Soul Brothers and One Not Taken. I uploaded all of Naked Soul Brother's demo take to Myspace when Myspace was a thing. They were since removed from their Band's page on Myspace. If anyone has these songs please share them with me!

Later Chapter

One of my many fond memories of Dave was building a giant sand castle on Cocoa Beach. Here you can see Adriene, Lauren dave and myself on the beach. Unfortunately, I can't find the video I made of them doing the Mermaid Dance - a ritual which must be performed on every sand castle to christen it and ensure it doesn't get washed away by the next tide. This trip was so enjoyable - we actually prepared by going to the hardware store and buying shovels and other construction tools necessary to build the ultimate sand castle.

Dave's life was a series of adventures, from the basement to the beach, to the snowy slopes, and every road trip in between. Once, post-9/11, I visited him in Crystal City, staying in a room straight out of "Being John Malkovich"—tiny, with a makeshift outdoor shower and a futon precariously balanced on cinder blocks. It was the kind of place that made you appreciate the simple things, like a solid roof and indoor plumbing.

Adios Muchacho

Unfortunately, I got into a bit of trouble in 2009 and as a result could no longer visit Dave in Ohio. And one of the reasons I guess it took so long to learn of his passing is that I couldn't visit due to continuing constraints. So I would touch base every other month or so mainly because well the thing about being friends with Dave is that is very active - I am sure that there are hundreds of people just like me who've been equally impacted and equally feel the loss of his kind warm and loving presense whereever he's gone. That's the thing - being friends with Dave wasn't just Dave - it was his whole universe and he shared and everyone shared in that. He was indeed the rudder of my life.

Visits with Dave and Adrienne in Miami, Ohio, were always a treat, filled with warmth and the kind of deep connection that only true friends share. Dave's embrace was always hearty, and every moment with him is now a treasured memory. I'm convinced that our spirits are bound to cross paths again in lives to come, and knowing Dave's out there somewhere makes the thought of my own passing less daunting. I'll see him on the other side, and I'm sure we'll pick up right where we left off. I love you, man.

Here's to Dave...

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